The Side Effects of Capitalism

I've worked in this office for five years now. I've seen a lot of people come and go, and I too am leaving now for good. Now there  will be side effects after having worked here...severe side effects. The various tales I hear of the after-life of people that have left this office are alarming to say the least-
Take for example ‘John Smith’, a man that had worked here for a couple of years, a very responsible and dedicated man, a man who came in early and left late without fail for 3 years straight. One fine morning 'John Smith'  packed his stuff and up and left and he made sure not to say goodbye to anyone. In fact one can say that his way of leaving was a grand ‘Fu*$ you’ to all of us in this office-No explanations, no excuses and a grand exit
 Fast forward a couple of months and I finally hear some news about 'John Smith'. A certain employee of ours took some clients out the other day to a very fancy restaurant, and there in the middle of this fancy restaurant stood 'John Smith' with his pants down exposing himself and his private parts to the entire restaurant.